Not Me! Monday!

It's that time again, this week has flown by and it's time for some Not Me! Monday! This carnival was created by MckMama, head over to http://mckmama.com/ to see what everyone else has NOT been doing this week!

I did NOT run out of cat food and decide to feed the cat a tortilla instead. It was NOT out of sheer laziness since I would have had to drive to the neighboring town to buy some since our local store is closed on Sundays. I treat my only pet in a childless home way better than that!

I am NOT at all hoping that my new niece or nephew will be born on any other day than my birthday. I would NOT ever be jealous of a new born baby sharing my one and only day to be utterly selfish and revel in. NOT me! That would just be kind of sad and bratty.

My car is definitely NOT in desperate need of an oil change. I am certainly NOT putting it off simply because I do NOT hate talking to mechanics at the oil change shops for fear of being ripped off or looking like a fool.

This week is the kick off for all my favorite shows and I am NOT excited as a school girl to finally have something good to watch on my DVR. That would be a little sad and I would NOT put watching TV on my list of favorite things to do. That's just lazy and I am NOT a lazy person!

Single Ladies

I've been feeling a little behind these days. I feel as if everyone around me is married with children. I got started off on the right foot a few years ago, but now I have taken such a drastic U-turn I wonder if I'll ever find my way back. Being one of the most impatient people ever, you can imagine how frustrated I've been. Everywhere I look there are couples, and not just couples, but HAPPY couples. I try to look beyond them and realize there must be singles out there, but maybe they have been banned in my area and I just didn't get the memo? Hmmm I'll have to look into that.

Sometimes I get pretty down and think there must be something wrong with me, and yes, I can make a mile-long list of those not-so-cool qualities. But then I think, hey wait a second, she's not perfect, and he's not perfect, and that guy's definitely not perfect! And yet they have the one thing that I am missing most in my life. I've been told before to not look so hard, but I've been doing that for a year and haven't had very good results with that method. I'm ready to meet someone and share my life with them. I'm ready to get back to where I was, but this time there will be one major difference, I want to be with the right guy!

I'm a terrible candidate for being a single gal trying to find her match, and here's my proof:

• I'm very shy when I first meet someone, and if I happen to like that person, it's magnified times 10!


• I usually hangout with guys a lot more than girls, which is like wearing a sign on my head that screams "don't even think about talking to me, one of these guys is my boyfriend".


• I'm 27 which seems like an age so rare in the single world it should be put on an endangered species list.


• I'm not into typical girlie things, for example a night out for me includes drinking beer all night, usually keeping up with, if not drinking most guys under the table. I don't sit in a high top chair sipping cosmos, no sir.


• I have a very small group of friends here. Over the years my besties move and I stay in the same place. This just limits me further by not having a large social group to mingle in.

• I know exactly what I want now, since I've already been married. This seems to just limit any potential guy even further.

So, as you can see I am in a place where I don't want to be at this time in my life. I'm trying my best to be patient, but that tank is running on E, actually it's running on fumes. I should look outside the box and realize that my life is fine without having a significant other, but it sure would be nice to meet somebody great to share it with! I think I'll focus on other things for now, try and continue to improve myself to be a better person.

Not Me! Monday!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I did NOT almost run away from a very cute boy man calling me by the wrong name while at Target. He did NOT continue to call me by the wrong name when I gave him a quick smile before I then tried to ignore him and play dumb. I was NOT at all embarrassed for him since he was NOT super excited and did NOT almost come running over to me while I quickly turned and jetted down another aisle. I was NOT at all a little disappointed that this very attractive man had me confused with a girl named Megan. NOT me!

I have NOT been tyring to make more homemade meals for one. I am NOT continually disappointed with my culinary skills and have NOT been continually frustrated with the oh so NOT delicious results. I do NOT have a very chic and updated kitchen to make my above mentioned dinners in. My parents did NOT spend all of their Sunday giving my new kitchen it's amazing results. I am NOT at all grateful for them! I did NOT have a terrible hangover that day and most certainly did NOT slack off at all.

I do NOT keep getting more and more bad news by the day. I do NOT think I am running so low on positive fuel that I do NOT want to just throw my hands up and give up. I am NOT thoroughly confused by the events in my life and the people in it. I do NOT want to sometimes pick up and move to Alaska to be an Eskimo. Having feelings of hopelessness is something that would definitely NOT happen in my life.

What have you been NOT doing lately?

Bitch List, er, Pet Peeves

OK, so I'm pretty sure around the same time every month I seem to get annoyed with the same kind of behavior...coincidence? I think not. I've decided to vent these annoyances on my blog, this way I can recognize these behaviors and try my best to deal with them without freaking out. I present to you,

The Bitch List:

• People who honk the horn of their vehicle to make damn sure that thing is locked each and every time they exit the vehicle. Because they obviously are smarter and cooler than everyone else in knowing that some thieve must be lurking around the corner just dying to steal their 1999 Ford Taurus. Seriously, I don't know who invented this feature, but it is so widely abused it causes my eye to twitch every time I hear a horn in a parking lot. It's locked, psycho, you can hear the locks moving into place from outside the car. We don't need to know that yes, you did in fact lock your Toyota piece of crap car by your honking. Thanks!

• Heavy breathers. I know some people just can't help it and I probably shouldn't complain about this one, but seriously! If I can hear you breathing, or gasping for air over the game in the background, you should probably have that looked at. Nothing a little sinus surgery can't fix.
• Having a monotone or extremely loud voice. Don't get me wrong, I have been teased about my quiet, high pitched, annoying voice ever since middle school. But maybe it's an opposite kind of deal, I just feel like running away from those who can't seem to change a decibel or talk with a 6 inch voice! On another note, I really do cherish those with soothing voices and really tend to gravitate towards them. I cannot tell you a single great friend or boyfriend I've had who possessed unpleasant vocal chords! Please don't be afraid that you won't be heard, or that if you change your voice a single decibel it might squeak. A little animation never hurt anybody.
• Terrible drivers. I would probably be categorized in this group according to some of my friends, but that would only be on the basis of aggressive driving. I would call a terrible driver someone who can't seem to keep up with the speed limit, constantly taps the breaks, starts to decelerate about a mile before the stop light, cranks their head around in the car so far they look like the exorcist just to look for other vehicles that might be within a 500 foot radius, which then of course they would wait, almost drive off the shoulder, cause other vehicles to lock up their breaks, almost killing the other 10 cars around them before finally deciding it's now safe to enter the freeway going an estimated 20 mph, those who just can't quite decide where and when to turn their cars, the idiot who is so wrapped up in a phone conversation that they have absolutely no idea what is going on around them, or that car that's riding your ass so bad you just want to slam on the breaks to give them a little heads up to back the hell up, because really you just don't want to deal with this a#*hole when he really does slam into you and you have a lot to do and the jerk probably doesn't even have car insurance. whew.
• slow-movers in the mall or other crowded area. I'm not an evil bitch, I'm not referring to the elderly or handicapped. I'm referring to those annoying groups that walk in a horizontal line moving at the pace of a snail. You try and try to sneak by them , but then you run into another road block, those pesky little kiosks full of knock-off bags and over-priced lotions. You would think that they could be more aware of their environment. Yes, you have a group of eight and you're taking up a massive amount of space in this already crowded mall, but can't you see that I am trying to get by while saying "excuse me" five times as loudly as I can with my non-projecting voice?! Get out tha way!

So there it is. The official Bitch List. It's amazing how much better I feel just venting about life's frustrations that sometimes get the best of me. I am still learning patience, and boy is it ever a tough lesson for me! I am one fast walking, fast driving, mouth breathing, quiet talking, and silent car locking girl. I can't imagine that anything I do would ever annoy anybody (enter huge smirk here). Life's little annoyances do teach us patience, and that patience does get put to the test on a daily basis. What are some of your pet peeves? What do you do to look past them and not freak out when your patience has fizzled?

Update!

I have lived in my home for over six years now, minus a year and a half in the miserably humid city of Houston, TX. Although we bought it brand new, I feel like it's time for a bit of an update, or actually, a major overhaul. Contractors tend to make everything pretty plain jane in the many condos and town homes that fill this small town I call home. Builder's beige in the rule of thumb! I prefer a more contemporary look, as anyone who knows me or my family would surely agree. I have enjoyed living here over the years, and obviously my pets have done the same...but of course you would never know that by the looks of the carpet (note major sarcasm here).

I had a carpet cleaning company do some estimates a few months back. What I saw through the eye-opening and jaw-dropping black light was enough to make my skin crawl. But we won't get into that for the sake of any future visitors I may have :). He recommended that I skip the cleaning and get new carpet all together. I'm not really a fan of carpet anyways, so I thought it would be great to put hard wood or laminate flooring in. This way spills and "such" are easily cleaned up, and I know exactly what is contained in and on my floors. We decided to to go with a dark walnut laminate floor with plush modern carpet in the bedrooms. I cannot express to you how excited I am to have my talented and loving father install this for me!

Other changes in store include painting all of the oak cabinetry in a modern Chicago Black. I'm going to change out any lingering gold hardware, including all the door knobs, replace the faucets with modern ones, install a new ceiling fan. Finally, we are going to paint the oak doors and closets to match the walls, a lovely shade of osyter white. Doesn't seem like too much work, but I know I'll be singing a different tune when we start this super fun little project. Thank God for my mom, she's a pro in the decor world and also one hell of a painter!

I'm excited to give my place a face lift, not only because it will look a lot more chic, but because I have been through a lot in this space and would truly enjoy a totally different look. After all, I am in such a drastically different place in life, why not make my home to match? Watch out world, one sweet bachelorette pad is in the works!

The ultimate bliss

Since my divorce a year ago, I have been thrown back into the single world after taking a 5 year hiatus. And the single world? Yah, it's a bit scary, and definitely like being thrown onto another planet without a map. I have had so much advice thrown at me, it's enough to make my head spin. From magazine articles, to dating shows, to my been-there-done-that friends, to books, to talk radio, to my younger, incredibly naive friends (no offense if you know who you are), to horoscopes, to wise parents, to guys themselves, I have heard it all. And what is the outcome of all of this advice to a single divorcee who has thrown herself back into the dating world? It all comes back to me, and what I believe, and what I will never change. That's right, I believe in the term that a lot of people seemed to have forgot about. I believe that all those rules, games, and hoopla that we're made to believe will find us "the one" is a bunch of unnecessary, stressful, confusing, and flat out BS. I believe in soul mates. I have experienced it first hand, and when it happens to you, there are absolutely no games to play, no rules to follow, no hoopla to jump through to get what you want. It's only pure passion, love, and an unexplainable energy that shakes you to your core.

I can only hope that everyone meets their soul mate someday. I don't think any life could be truly complete without experiencing and living out this blissful connection. I get frustrated when I see couples that are merely together because they say they love each other, but really aren't soul mates. Meanwhile they could be missing out on meeting their soul mate because they are so afraid of being alone if they leave their current partner. The universe will bring you to your soul mate, but it's up to you to take a leap of faith with that person and give into your true feelings. Finding your soul mate is like discovering an entirely new aspect on life. To me, it's the ultimate find that leads to true, blissful happiness. Call me a hopeless romantic, unrealistic, or just plain crazy, but once you experience it, you believe in it! I trust in God that the path he has me on must be the right one, but it's definitely questionable to me at times! I can't go into detail about my personal situation about soul mates right now, but all I have to say is love will find it's way. I'm being taught patience, which has got to be one of the most difficult lessons to learn. I believe in destiny, I believe in love, and I believe in soul mates.

Winter, spring, summer, or fall? Which is the best of them all?

Born and raised in the good 'ol Midwest, I have always enjoyed each and every season. I love the crisp Autumn air that whirls around during my favorite time of year, fall. This kind of 50-60 degree weather is enough to make me love doing any activity outside, but I also happen to have a fondness for college football, Halloween, gorgeous leaves changing by the day, and pumpkin pie. What a lot of Midwesterners don't like about fall, however, is the season that happens to follow it...WINTER. I happen to like winter, at least for a month or two. I have always been a fan of cooler weather, and really don't enjoy being the least bit hot.

Winter is a calm season to me, people tend to nest and stay inside to avoid the frigid wind chill and blustering snow. Winter is what makes Christmas, well, CHRISTMAS! I spent one Christmas in the South, sans snow, and I felt completely cheated of one of my favorite holidays! A green, or more like brown with flooded spots, isn't anything like a white Christmas. I don't feel obligated to be outside in the winter, much like I do in the summer, or even fall and spring. I can cozy up with a snugly blanket, flip the fireplace on (yah, I don't use real wood, come on), pop a movie in, and then feel so incredibly safe and sound. Safe from the outside world, safe from life and it's many ups and downs, safe from the Arctic blast of air outside my door.

Winter does get a little old, I must admit. After January has come and gone, and I've had my fix of snow days and nights nestled in my house, it gets a little depressing! This is usually the time of year I hit the tanning bed a time or two, in seek of a little color and Vitamin D to cure the blues. We must, as winter-laden residents, trudge through (literally) the span of the winter months.

Just as people are becoming volatile and fed up, most upon the return of a fabulous warm weather get-away, spring appears much like a gift from Mother Nature. The temperature gauge hits 60, and just like that, people are as happy and joyous as ever while sporting their shorts and t-shirts freshly removed from storage. And rightly so, because spring does bring many things joyous to the four season land. Washing all the salt and sand residue from vehicles, cracking open the now thawed out sunroof, seeing green for the first time in 6 months, oh, and baby chicks.

Now we get to the good stuff, the reason some people say they reside in the Midwest...SUMMER! This short-lived but lived-up time of year brings out the most activities and festivals of the whole year. I truly think we try and enjoy each and every moment of the beautiful weather in fear of the seasons lurking around the corner. I, however, prefer fall and the cooler weather it brings us. When I was a kid, I was always encouraged to spend every waking moment of summer outside and "enjoying the weather". But once it hits 80 degrees, and if I'm not laying in some kind of body of water, there is no enjoyment involved! To this day, if I don't spend every hot, sunny day outside, I feel a sense of guilt (thanks, Mom! Ha! JK). I usually have very high expectations of summer, every year it comes around it must be the best one ever. I think I was finally able to let that go this past summer. There are plenty of fun things to do all year round, and there are no expectations or guilt trips involved!

I love having four seasons and the change that each one brings. I like to sense the change coming and always get excited for what it will hold in store for me. So, as I write this, we are fast approaching a new season, and it just happens to be my favorite! Here's to every football-loving, Halloween-crazed, leaf-changing admirer, and pumpkin pie-savoring person, I write to you, ENJOY!

this little piggie went to market, this little piggie turned vegetarian.

I was raised eating meat, which usually meant dinner made with a pound of ground beef, pork chops, or chicken breasts used in the many meals my mom made for us. In college, I ate at the cafeteria and found many meat-molded shapes of "nuggets " or "strips" to my liking. I had many late night runs-ins after partying at Taco Bell, (or "Taco Hell" as we called it) Burger King and McDonald's. Then, when I became a wife, I tried my best at cooking dinner every night to feed my ex-husband some kind of meat-laden concoction. Yes, for 27 years I was a meat-eating girl who never thought twice about what I was putting in my mouth. I even met my bestie over a year ago, who has been a vegetarian, or "veggie" as I like to refer to, for many years now. Her non-meat-eating ways only made me think twice as to whether or not the restaurant or house we were going to would have options for her to choose from. I knew her reasons for becoming a veggie, but never considered becoming one myself. I have always been known to my friends and family as the biggest animal lover on the planet. I cherish each and every kind of animal on our planet. I feel so extremely passionate about animal abuse, I almost make myself sick even thinking it. I think that animal abusers should be in prison for the rest of their sorry-ass lives, and that's to say the least.

So why, do you ask, have I all of a sudden, out of the blue decided to become a veggie myself??? That's a great question, and the answer is very simple...I read a book. A book called Skinny Bitch. I had no idea what I was wrapping my eyes around when I started that cute, raunchy, and real-as-it-gets book! They spill the beans on how skinny people are healthy people in a way that would have never crossed my mind. They are VEGANS. They tell you how the animals are raised in absolutely horrific conditions, and then proceed to detail their miserable lives on the route to their death, and finally describe how these animals are tortured and killed in the most inhumane way at slaughter houses. There are many confessions from the slaughter house workers noted in the book. Reading all of these tragic and heart-wrenching stories made me want to know more, and also to find out what I could do to help stop this kind of treatment to animals. In this book, (which I highly recommend!) they mention the website for vegans, which is http://www.goveg.com/ (please check it out for yourself!!!!!). I was immediately drawn to the videos shown on the website. I was a bawling, sobbing mess by the end of the first 30 seconds. This kind of treatment is enough to make any compassionate human being (which I hope there are still some out there) want to make it STOP.

I immediately decided to put my meat-eating ways to an end. I even considered becoming a vegan, but living in the Midwest, I really felt that my options would be so limited I would have a hard time with that. So no meat it is for me. I'm into my first week and let me tell you, I do not have a fondness for vegetarian food, but I have not given up yet! I think it's going to take time for my taste buds to adjust, after all, they have been used to the taste of rotting carcus for the last 27 years. barf. As you read this, I hope you consider reading the book, or at least checking out the website. For every vegetarian there is, 100 animals are saved from the slaughterhouse each year. There are so many issues behind all of this, but I can't possibly begin to detail them like the book and website do. So, wish this newly veggie good luck, and somebody pass the tofu!

Is It Time Already???

Am I growing up? At the tender age of 27??? I never thought this day would come. Maybe it's just a fluke, or hormones, or laziness? I have not wanted to go out all week, and yes, I am writing a post for my blog on a Friday night!!! Eeeeeek! What the heck has gotten into me? Well, let's see, I can tell you one thing...I sure am getting sick and tired of the "bar scene" especially around here. I'm starting to see the same people out(most I don't even know), do the same thing, and feel the same way the next day, hungover! Yes I have to admit, it's very fun, especially since I tend to be a bit on the crazy and wild side when it comes to partying (you didn't hear that from me though). But honestly, I think after a decade or so of partying I might be ready to slow my roll a bit. Mom would be so proud ;). Most people had this epiphany when they were out of college, you know, 23 or 24. Not me! Maybe going through a divorce shot be back into the college era style of living, or maybe that's just my excuse.
On another note, I haven't really wanted to go out because getting all "dolled up" seems like such a chore lately. I pride myself on getting ready pretty fast, 30 minutes done. Now I just want to chill at home with my wet hair and make-up free face! Is that so bad? Is it just summer or am I turning into one of those women who just stops caring about their looks? With that attitude you would think I have three kids and a husband running around here, nope, just me and the cat. (By the way, I'm pretty sure this is just a phase and I will always try and look my best, or at least descent, it's in my blood, and I don't mean that in a conceded kind of way.) I used to love to have cute and new outfits to wear out, they made me feel good! I have not been buying or wearing any cute and new outfits for awhile now. Money saver? :)
Maybe it's time to grow up. Maybe I need to keep this change of lifestyle business around. This last week I stayed in every night and read books(OK I had two beers one night, but it doesn't count because it was just a bad date, still trying to block it out of my head). I hear some of you snickering as you read this, yes I read books all week. And it felt great!
I think this new adult way of life is something I should definitely stick with. I knew the day was coming, I just didn't think it'd be so soon! I'm still just a single divorcee living alone in a small town! I guess I will just have to trust The Man Upstairs, fate, and a lil luck to guide me through this life of mine. After all, it's pretty hard to meet somebody when you have your nose in a book all night!

My First Day As a Mom!

Ok, so my niece just turned 2 last month, and she is about as cute and charismatic as they come. Today I had the opportunity to watch her ALL day, and boy did I jump at that! Our day started a little iffy...Grammy met me in CR, which is half-way for us. Elle is quite fond of her grammy and didn't exactly want to get in the car with Aunt Jenny. We quickly recovered from tears by playing, what else, Dido! It was all smiles from there. She was really excited to see "Kitty", my cat of many names, who she really hasn't seen since she was just a baby. We had fun chasing that cat all over the house, with Elle yelling "KIITTTYYY!!!" while trying so hard to just get a quick pat on the head for him.
Next up, our trip to Target to get a toy! Come on, I'm her only Aunt and I'm going to spoil the crap out of her :) I was a little nervous toting her around in the cart, you have to understand, I am a total rookie at this stuff! She was happy as a lamb after our $1 bin scavenging, we found some weird squishy monster and some plastic magnetic letters. Off to the toy department...pretty fun, but kinda sad I couldn't really afford the $40 plastic guitar she was mesmerized by. But no tears, no pouting, no meltdowns!!! Mission accomplished. And our grand total= $2.12. Wow, 2 year olds are truly easily amused :)
I took a shot at toting her out to the carousel, which is right next to Target. Oh boy, her eyes lit up like fireworks! She was ready to get on that thing and get on now! So here I am carrying my lil tike, my over-stuffed purse, her beloved bear, and our Target purchases while trying desperately to find the cash in my wallet. I knew if I let her down she would havebe shot over to that thing faster than a speeding bullet. After my struggle, I managed to find a $5 bill and quickly got change in quarters for the ride. So, here we are in line ready to go! But wait...what's this token sign I see? Oh geez you have to get a freakin token to ride the carousel. Ok, struggling once more I manage to find another $5 and so then must purchase 5 tokens, we only needed ONE! Ahh, so really the carousel ended up costing 5 bucks, but hey, it was worth it. Elle was almost screaming for them to start the damn thing! Made me smile to see her so happy :)
The rest of our day adventure was pretty low-key, coloring, watched some toons, had some lunch, more of cat-chasing. I hope I get to have more days like this with my little side-kick sweetheart. Ahh, the joys of parenting...lol

Inside out, and upside down?

Times, they are a changing! When I look back even 5 years ago, wow, sooo much has changed in my life. I had just met my future-husband, was getting started in nursing school, and pretty much having a great time in life. After a few years of dating, my now-ex and I got married, and at the same time I had graduated nursing school. Great, right?! Hmmm, maybe not so great. Long story made short, three years later we got a divorce. I was quite unhappy during that time, and often caught myself daydreaming of the single life. Well, now I have it! And guess what? It's not that freakin great either. Which brings me to this...what is ever going to make me happy??? I feel like I've been through enough relationships, hardships, and all those other ships that I deserve to be happy. Then I realized the hard truth...only I can make myself happy. Then maybe later on someone could join me and we could be happy together. There, I said it. I have to be happy with myself before anyone else can make me happy.